random stream [18 Mar 2010|02:09am] rruffles [ music | Sondre ] I'm tired. I work, and I'm sure it's good for me, but why should I work the amount I do? Sometimes it gives me satisfaction. Sometimes it teaches me. Many times it frustrates me. I almost always do more work than my peers. But why should it be like that? If I don't pick up the slack, no one will, so I have to carry two or three times the load. But regardless, I'm happy. It's almost Spring Break, and I'm ready to go home. I'm not completely burnt out right now, but I'm still ready for the short vacation. I'm building a bed frame for my room that I'm moving into in a month and a half. It will be fun, cheaper, and give me a custom made frame that I can use for a long time. I'm starting to wonder if I should make some more stuff, since I won't necessarily be able to afford pre-made furniture. I don't really have any money right now, and I don't feel like working a bunch to make some. I would love to make some money, but I don't like doing it while I'm busy with school. I'm just excited to get on break and start building. I really hope the rain stops. I'm so sick of it. If it rains next week, I'm going to be angry. post comment

The leaves that are green turn to brown. [16 Mar 2010|11:45pm] rruffles [ mood | hopeless ] [ music | S&G ] It's amazing how frustrating it is to want something so badly and not be able to do anything about it. It's as if I'm doing something wrong. But I know that I am not! Yet I am beginning to feel hopeless. If I am doing nothing wrong, then it is not something in my control! And if it's not in my control then who is to know however long I will be alone! Will I ever find someone to be happy with? Will I ever find someone good enough that see something special in me? Will I ever find someone who sees something special in me at all? My feet are cold. I don't even really know what to say. I have all these feelings that I want to express, but I can do nothing about it. I'm so satisfied with my life, but I want the perfect person to share it with. Something comfortable. Something beautiful. Something soothing, and something refreshing. So what am I doing wrong? Not even a hint. Not even a hint of the slightest of luck in years. I was twenty-one years when I wrote this song. I'm twenty-two now but I won't be for long. Time hurries on; and the leaves that are green turn to brown, and they wither with the wind, and they crumble in your hand. Once my heart was filled with the love of a girl. I held her close, but she faded in the night, like a poem I meant to write. Hello, hello, hello, hello, good-bye, good-bye, good-bye, good-bye. That's all there is. And the leaves that are green turned to brown. post comment

To my girl, whereever I may find her [11 Mar 2010|12:54am] rruffles [ mood | wishful ] [ music | S&G ] I wandered empty streets down Past the shop displays I heard cathedral bells Tripping down the alleyways As I walked on And when you ran to me Your cheeks flushed with the night We walked on frosted fields Of juniper and lamplight I held your hand And when I awoke And felt you warm and near I kissed your honey hair With my grateful tears Oh I love you, girl I love you But it was only a dream. And once again I awoke to return to my normal world.   (Post #500!!) post comment

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